"I Don’t Care About the Money” (and Other Nonsense)

When someone tells me they’re not in business for the money, I want to ask why.

Why don’t you care about it? If you truly don’t care, would you give it all away? Would you throw it out the window?

Usually, that isn’t what they mean. They want to make clear that people matter to them. They don’t want caring about money to make them seem greedy.

In Episode 340, I challenged that qualifier. You can care about money and care about people. You don’t need to deny one to prove the other.

A business needs you to care about money

A business creates revenue and profit. Money matters to whether it can continue doing its work.

When I care about the money in my business, I can care for employees, customers, suppliers, and the people in my life. I can provide what money makes possible.

People come first for me. Caring for customers and creating value are part of making money, rather than obstacles to it.

I met someone I admired who was very successful and kept saying he wasn’t in it for the money. He described business as a game.

I pointed out that money was how he kept score in that game. Saying you care about the game but not the score misses something important.

You are allowed to want a profitable business. That doesn’t mean you care about profit more than people.

Having money is different from spending it

Sometimes “I don’t care about money” means there isn’t anything you want to buy.

That is a different statement. You may not want to spend on things you consider frivolous. You can still care about having money and how you use it.

Money can help your family, support other businesses, provide for yourself, and create opportunities to contribute.

It gives you choices about where its energy goes. When you purchase something, hire an employee, or support someone, you are directing it.

If you mean you aren’t interested in buying more things, say that. Don’t turn it into a claim that the money itself doesn’t matter.

Listen to the way you talk about money

I love money. When I say that, I feel connection, abundance, and generosity.

Some people hear it as though I am saying I love money at the expense of something more important. I’m not. There are things I love much more, and I understand the limits of what money can do.

I also know that my relationship with money matters. Thoughts create feelings, which drive actions and results. The sentences you say about money are part of that relationship.

Try saying that you care about money, want to make more, or enjoy the money part of business. Notice what comes up in your body.

What do you think those words mean about you? Can you say them confidently in front of another person?

Now notice how it feels to say you don’t care. For me, that feels dismissive and neglectful because it isn’t true.

Be honest about what you want. If you aren’t ready to say you love money, you can at least stop telling a story that denies your desire.

Being careful is part of caring

I am careful with money because I care about it. I want to be a steward of it and use it wisely.

That includes providing for my life, my children, employees and their families, and suppliers and their businesses.

The money is going to be in the world. If I have earned it, I get to choose how to direct it.

People who tell me they aren’t in it for money often have huge hearts. They want to contribute, donate, and help. Caring about money can give them more ability to offer financial help.

You don’t have to make your desire for money an embarrassment. Look at the work, value, and possibilities connected to it.

When generosity feels awkward

As I became wealthier, I noticed a challenge in friendships. Paying for a dinner might have very little effect on my finances while having a significant effect on someone else’s budget.

I wanted to pay generously. Sometimes that seemed to create awkwardness, obligation, guilt, or a feeling of inequality.

I talked with my friend Kris Plachy about a trip I had given her for her birthday. There had been no weirdness around it.

She described feeling so much gratitude. That helped me see what was working: generosity was meeting gratitude.

We weren’t dismissing money as unimportant. We were using it to create an experience of connection and abundance.

Give without strings and receive with gratitude

If you want to give, consider what that means to you. Are there no strings attached? No expectation that the other person do something in return? No resentment that you are paying?

Can you make clear that it is a choice you want to make to include, connect, and share?

Then consider the experience of receiving. You may be used to feeling guilty, inadequate, or obligated when someone offers something.

Gratitude gives you another way to respond. You can appreciate the gift and the person’s generosity without trying to match the dollar amount.

If a friend insists on buying your lunch, you can genuinely appreciate that they want to do it. Let yourself feel the thanks rather than just saying the words.

That creates connection through two positive emotions. The exchange doesn’t have to become a comparison of financial circumstances.

I want to be generous without losing connection. I also want to receive generosity in a way that makes room for more of it.

Honor what you have created

In the episode, I described walking into my Austin home and appreciating the work that made it possible. It was a physical representation of value I had created and money I had earned.

I could be proud of being willing to fail and continue working. Caring about money was connected to caring about myself.

Look at the small things you say about money. Are they true? Do they help you create the relationship you want?

You can care about earning, having, and using money. You can care about people. You can give generously and receive gratefully. Let those things belong together.