My Human Life

Write a life manifesto that makes room for gratitude, ambition, discomfort, and the adventure of being here.

What do you want to do with your human life?

You may have answered smaller versions of that question: what job you want, where you want to live, or what goal you want to accomplish next. But have you considered the whole experience you want to create?

This episode invites you to write a personal manifesto. It's a way to decide what matters to you without waiting for a future moment when every part of life is finally complete.

Question the idea of a final arrival

It's easy to imagine that one achievement will make you permanently satisfied. Once you have the job, relationship, house, or result, you will have arrived.

Then you achieve it and discover that you still have desires and difficult emotions. The horizon moves.

In this episode, I explore an idea inspired by Tracy Goss's The Last Word on Power: you can acknowledge unfinished desires as part of living, rather than interpret them as proof that something is wrong.

You can appreciate what you have accomplished and still want to grow.

Distinguish growth from never being good enough

Wanting more isn't necessarily the same as believing you are inadequate.

You can pursue a new challenge because you are curious about what you might create. You can want to develop a skill while respecting who you are now.

Notice the thought behind your next goal. Are you trying to earn permission to like yourself? Or are you interested in the experience and contribution the goal might make possible?

The distinction changes how you approach the work. A goal doesn't have to be a verdict on your present worth.

Make room for the full emotional experience

Trying to build a life with no negative emotion can keep you from doing meaningful things.

You may avoid a goal because it could bring disappointment, uncertainty, or rejection. But staying where you are doesn't guarantee a life without those feelings.

Ask whether you are willing to experience discomfort while pursuing something that matters. You don't have to choose between enjoying life and allowing its difficult parts.

You can appreciate a good moment without requiring it to last forever, and work through a hard moment without making it the whole story.

Let an ambitious goal expand your thinking

An apparently impossible goal can reveal the limits you have placed on what you will consider.

You may normally ask whether you already know how to do something before allowing yourself to want it. A bigger goal asks you to imagine beyond that familiar evidence.

It also makes room for unsuccessful attempts. You aren't expecting a perfectly known path. You are choosing something that will require learning.

What would you pursue if failure along the way were part of the process rather than a reason not to begin?

Use your thoughts to support participation

The Self-Coaching Model connects thoughts to feelings, feelings to actions, and actions to results.

Thinking you must feel complete before you can enjoy your life may keep you waiting. Thinking you can appreciate today and still grow can support a fuller response.

Notice which thoughts help you participate in the life you have. Which ones encourage creation, contribution, or curiosity? Which ones keep you hiding?

Your manifesto can remind you of the thinking and choices you want to practice when fear becomes persuasive.

Write your own human life manifesto

Begin with what is important to you. What do you want to create, say, change, or try? How do you want to show up? What experiences do you want to be willing to have?

Write in your own language. You don't need to copy someone else's ambition or make the statement impressive.

Include both what you want to do and who you want to be while doing it. Perhaps you want to create, learn, love, contribute, or take more considered risks.

Then choose an action that expresses one part of the manifesto. Put it on your calendar and notice what thinking you need to support it.

You don't need a life with no unfinished desires to have a meaningful one. You can decide how you want to participate in this human experience, and begin living that decision now.