Big Goal Fun

A big goal can make your life more exciting before you achieve it.

That is the part I want you to understand.

If you think all the fun waits at the finish line, a goal that takes five or ten years can feel like a long period of not being where you should be. Every delay becomes evidence against you.

But setting a new possibility can change your direction, focus, feelings, and daily actions now. You become the person who can achieve the goal before the result arrives.

Do not use the goal against yourself

I coach people who have well-laid plans but struggle to follow through. Managing urges, planning deliberately, and taking responsibility are important.

Sometimes the missing piece is a compelling goal.

Other times, they have written down a big goal but have not cultivated it. They keep measuring how far away it is and criticizing themselves for not reaching it sooner.

No wonder they are not excited to act. They have turned the goal into a reminder of what they have not done.

I want you to create a different relationship with it: a possibility that helps you grow and gives you a direction you genuinely want.

Understand what the process gives you

I set a significant physical health goal and gave myself a year to work toward it.

I do not like the workouts. But I love practicing consistency, discipline, and following through for myself. I love increasing my strength and pushing myself to show up.

I can see my body changing. Yet my focus is not only on whether I have arrived. It is also on the connection with myself I create by doing what I decided to do.

Sometimes I have to find a gym or adapt the exercises to the equipment available. Often I do not feel like doing it. Working through those things is part of the goal's value.

The future goal anchors the direction. The day-to-day experience changes the quality of my life now.

Start with what you actually want

The first part of cultivating a goal is knowing what you want.

That may take time. Many people have not asked themselves the question enough to have a clear answer.

Consider more than the final result. Include the life you want while working toward it.

I coached an ER doctor earning around $500,000 who wanted to explore other businesses. She worried she would replace one demanding job with another that required just as much time.

I told her to include the time she wanted to work in the goal itself. The goal could contain both the income and a schedule she wanted.

Do not quietly attach a life of suffering to a result you say you desire.

Include your lifestyle in the plan

Early in my career, I studied Dan Sullivan's ideas about time off, thinking time, and focused work.

I set up my business goals around working three days a week. That was part of what I wanted, not something I would consider only after becoming successful.

Your ingredients may be different.

Ask what the process would require and whether you want that life. How do you want your work, time, and other priorities to fit together?

Regardless of whether you know exactly how to make it possible yet, be honest about what you want to create.

Look at your relationship with the goal

How do you write the goal? How do you feel when you read it? Why does it matter?

A goal should help you become more of who you want to be and expand your capacity.

Something may sound nice to have without connecting to a process you are willing to live.

I want you to consider the person you would become by practicing the skills the goal requires. Choosing thoughts, generating feelings, and taking action in one area can create abilities you carry into others.

I call those strategic byproducts. They may become more valuable than the original result.

You do not need a goal because you are unhappy. You can set one to see what you can do with your life, for fun.

Anticipate the obstacles

Once you know what you want, work on the how.

Write down the obstacles you expect and create strategies for them. This takes mental energy before you begin.

No one can anticipate every obstacle for you. You know your own patterns.

With my workouts, I could predict losing interest, making excuses, or deciding the results were not happening fast enough. I also considered smaller practical obstacles around getting to the gym and completing the work.

I approached this playfully, as someone who knows herself: I know what my brain might say, and here is how I plan to answer.

Then the daily practice becomes having my own back and gently pushing myself to do what I want to do.

Turn obstacles into strategies before they arrive

I spend pages cultivating and planning a goal before I start taking action.

It is more than announcing a desire. It includes decisions about the goal, its deadline, the plan, and the actions I will take.

When people tell me life happened, I want them to notice that life is always happening. Planning can help us face the things likely to come up instead of treating each one as a reason to stop.

Big goals are achieved through little actions repeated over time. The planning supports those actions.

Give your brain a direction

Your brain filters what it notices. A compelling goal gives it something to look for.

Without that direction, it can spend its time seeking pleasure and scanning for danger. You can stay busy in that pattern without exploring your capacity.

Ask what you might wish you had started ten years from now.

You can become a different person through the attempt, not only through the achievement. Choose what you want, include the life you want to live, anticipate obstacles, and build the relationship with yourself that keeps you showing up.

That is the fun of a big goal: the possibility of who you can become while you are living it.